Nostalgia

You know how there are certain places, smells, or songs that just take you back? For me, these things can give me this feeling inside your chest that is really hard to explain. It's a nostalgic feeling, I suppose.

My dad's little town in central Virginia--and the surrounding area--is one of those things.

Perhaps it was because it had been four years since I'd been there.

Maybe it was because it was my first time back as a married mom.

But there was just something about driving the streets of that little town, and those back-country roads, that sent waves of memories washing over me.

Growing up, my brothers and I spent eight weeks--practically the entirety--of every summer living with my dad in this town. Sometimes, we didn't particularly like the arrangement. We were robbed of the opportunity to spend the summers with our friends, at home, like "normal" kids did. It wasn't always fun. There was drama. There was boredom. We ate a lot of Hamburger Helper.

Looking back, however, I've come to realize that we were given so much more than was "taken away."

In addition to being with my dad, those weeks gave us the opportunity to see and know my grandparents, despite the fact that they lived eight hours away from us. Most kids who live in a different state than their grandparents are lucky to see them for a week (or maybe even just a weekend) each year. We had built-in playmates in a kinda/sorta stepbrother, as well as my four cousins. And other extended family members.

There were summers where we spent nearly every waking minute in my grandparents' pool. All of us cousins--swimming, making up games, fighting, laughing, splashing. I'd venture to say a bond was formed among all of us that simply cannot ever be broken. It's sort of sad now that we don't see each other. The relationships are different, but the shared experiences of those summers will forever keep us connected.

One of my cousins, Sabrina, was usually the closest to me--we are only five months apart in age--and so we were often inseparable. When we were eight, we permed our hair together (oh lord, that was a mistake). We used to plan "movie nights" for which we would go to the grocery store, buy every kind of junk food imaginable, and park ourselves in her basement watching videos until we ate so much we had stomachaches. When we were 15, her uncle taught us how to drive--late at night, on a dark dirt road, the windows down and the music blaring, drowning out the sounds of the crickets.

Still, so much fun was had as a big group. I have vivid memories of spending days at the river, letting the current carry us down until we'd get out and walk back upstream to the car. We took hikes that led up to a natural pool that we affectionately called "The Green Lagoon" after watching the movie The Blue Lagoon several times one summer. We took late-night runs to 7-Eleven for slurpies. We spent the 4th of Julys out in fields where our dads, uncles, and some of their friends set off (what were probably illegal) fireworks. We had "The Summer of Johnny," during which we all got a huge kick out of a drunk old man neighbor who used to visit my aunt and uncle's house unannounced, looking for liquor (long story). When we were lucky, my uncle would take us all to the lake to go tubing on his boat. Sometimes, we'd go catfishing in the pitch dark of the night.

Oh, and we cannot ever forget the epic group trips to Virginia Beach. We'd caravan in several cars the 2+ hour drive, making games of passing snacks between moving cars (awesomely safe, I know) and making faces and motions (some appropriate, others probably notsomuch) at each other as we passed. One particular summer, my uncle (no longer my uncle, by the way) made reservations for a huge group of us--probably 15+ people?--at a campground near the beach. He had reserved a cabin, and we were all really excited about it. Imagine how that excitement died when we got there and realized that the cabin could sleep MAYBE six people. And that the cabin was like 100 degrees inside. I am not even exaggerating when I say that there are some of us who ended up sleeping on air mattresses on the lawn. And in cars. Or in the back of a pick-up. The people who were camping nearby us probably thought we were the freaking Clampetts. But I look back on that now and think it is absolutely hilarious.

We went to pig roasts.

We regularly had barbecues at my grandparents' house, by the pool--even if we had already spent the entire day at the pool already.

If we begged enough, my uncle and dad would take us all out to Golden Corral (as you can tell, we had super high dining standards).

Looking back at all of that, I'd actually say it was the perfect way to spend my summer vacations.

Was it actually perfect? No. For a lot of reasons that I won't get into. But the bottom line is that when I go back to Virginia, when I go back to that sleepy, slow little town, I am overwhelmed by the good memories--not assaulted by the bad.

So you can imagine, then, how I felt when Michael, Nora and I walked down my dad's driveway, took a few turns, and ended up back at the elementary school. The one where my cousins and I used to go to play on the playground, and run around the hills. Where my brothers and I went to play baseball. Where I remember watching countless recreational adult softball games with my dad and some of his cousins.

Being an adult now, and having adult perspective--work, money, responsibility--I'd do just about anything to rewind time and live one of those summers (at least the fun parts) all over again.

Life was just so... simple.

Imagine that.

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Monticello

Aside from visiting family and relaxing at my dad's, the one outing we did take was to visit Monticello--the home of Thomas Jefferson, the third President of the United States.

Although there are many things I did and places I went in all of my summers spent in Virginia with my dad, Monticello was not one of them. My mom tells me that I went as a young child (in fact, she says I was about Nora's age), but of course, I don't remember that.

It was a nice fall day to take a ride up there and walk around.

Monticello is set up on top of a big hill overlooking Charlottesville, Virginia. As we drove all the way up to the top, my dad kept saying, "Can you imagine going all the way up here by horse?" Crazy when you think of it that way.

Thomas Jefferson was apparently really into gardening. Well, really into having his slaves garden for him, anyway. The plantation was self-sustainable because of all of the food they grew right there on the side of the mountain. He believed that the majority of your diet should be made up of vegetables, which was pretty unusual in the late 1700s. The garden still exists, with vegetables still growing. I'd love to have a garden that huge!

This structure, overlooking the gorgeous view down below, was rebuilt. The original deteriorated.

This chimney (and some foundation) are all that's left of a joinery that used to exist on Mulberry Row (where the slaves lived and many worked).

On the property is a family cemetery, where Jefferson was buried when he died at age 83.

After we walked the grounds for a little bit, it was time for our guided house tour. We headed up to the house to go inside with our group and guide.

We didn't take any photos inside (we were too busy trying to listen to the tour guide while also keeping Nora busy/entertained/quiet), but it was really interesting. While there is much to admire about Jefferson (he could read in seven languages, for instance), there is also much to shake your head at (the fact that he owned approximately 200 slaves at any given time, and it is believed that he fathered several children with one of his female slaves after his wife, Martha Jefferson, passed away). Obviously, the 1700s were a drastically different time in history, and regardless of what you think of the man, there is little denying his impact on the country at that time.

Nora didn't make it through the entire tour. She started losing her patience with us when we got into the last room, so I ducked out on this terrace area with her while Michael and my dad listened to the remainder of the tour. Once she was through with everyone else, the tour guide took me back into the last room and told me what she had told the group--I thought that was really nice of her!

After the tour, we walked around a bit more. There were areas of the cellar that were open to walk through, some areas with artifacts that were interesting to see and read about.

Although our little Nora is 14 months old and still not walking (late bloomer, I guess!), she certainly was in the mood for practicing at Monticello. Once she got going, she didn't want to be picked up! Miss Independent...

It was getting late in the afternoon and Nora was clearly spent, so we called it quits to go get dinner somewhere. We took the shuttle back down the hill to the visitor's center, where we encountered a life-size statue of ol' Thomas Jefferson himself:

He was quite tall--6'3"!

It was a nice way to spend an afternoon, but we generally like doing stuff like this. If you like history and you're ever in the area of Charlottesville, Virginia, I'd certainly recommend a trip up to Monticello.

Probably a slim chance, but... have any of you ever been to Monticello? What did you find most fascinating about Jefferson's plantation and/or his life?

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Family Ties

We didn't do a whole lot during our trip to Virginia. It wasn't really a vacation so much as it was just a trip to visit my dad and some of his side of the family.

The agenda? There wasn't one. We pretty much flew by the seats of our pants, and spent a lot of time doing a whole lot of nothing, which was nice.

When we woke up on Friday morning, we were still pretty tired from getting in late the night before, so we lounged around in our pajamas until Nora went down for a morning nap--at which point WE went down for a morning nap, too.

Awake and (a little bit) rejuvenated, we all got ready and made the drive out to my grandparents' house to visit them for the first time in four years. It's crazy how that much time passed since our last trip down, but hey, it happens.

My grandparents were thrilled to get to meet Nora in person for the first time. They've seen tons of photos (my 83-year-old granddad is on Facebook, how cool is that?), but it just wasn't the same.

(Loved the natural light in their house.)

My granddad is recovering from his second knee replacement surgery (done just a couple of weeks ago), so he was pretty laid up still. Nora sat in his lap nicely for about 0.2 seconds. She's going through another "stranger danger" slash "shy" phase, which is a bummer for great-grandparents who just want to snuggle her. :(

My dad wanted to get a photo of the three generations. We should've had Dad get in the photo, too, but I guess he just wanted a pic of the girls in his life. :)

We visited my grandparents all three days we were there. On the last night, my granddad said how photos just don't do Nora justice, which I thought was very sweet. It also made me really sad, because I know that it could very well be another year before we make it back down there again. Knowing how much Nora will change in that period of time--it's heartbreaking knowing all that they'll miss. My dad misses a lot, too. It's terrible living so far away from family!

If you live away from your family, how do you handle it? Especially if you have children?

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We survived.

We're home from our road trip to see my dad and his side of the family.

It was a total of 8.5 hours on the way down. And 9.5 hours on the way back up. With a 14-month-old and a miniature dachshund.

We survived. :) Want to know how?

After seeing so many of you recommend leaving at night, we bit the bullet and did it. We loaded most of our things in the car on Wednesday night, and drove together to daycare, then work on Thursday morning. I was able to get out of work a couple of hours early, and went home to pack the car, pick up dinner (subs to go!) and pick up Nora from daycare. Nora, Tessa, and I arrived at Michael's office right at 5:00 to get him, and from there, we hit the road.

I fed Nora her dinner in the backseat while Michael took the first (short) shift. At the last minute, I grabbed one of our cutting boards to prop across Nora's car seat for her to eat off of, like a tray--it worked perfectly. She had no problems feeding herself on the go (we kept it simple with turkey, cheese, peas, carrots, and pineapple) and that occupied her for a good 20-30 minutes of the ride. Once she finished, I cleaned her up, gave her some puffs in a snack cup + a sippy cup of water, turned on Toy Story 3, and climbed up front to eat my sub. Once I was done eating, we pulled off to a rest stop and quickly swapped spots so Michael could eat, too.

Backing up for a second... Toy Story 3. I'll tell you what: Our iPad? If that thing seemed to be an indulgent purchase before, it proved to be a downright NECESSITY on this trip. As far as we're concerned, that thing is worth its weight in gold. Nora got a couple of Disney movies for Christmas last year, and Toy Story 3 came with a digital copy, which I was able to easily transfer to the iPad. I downloaded a few episodes of a cute train show (she's into "choo choos" right now), and then we ended up buying another Disney movie in Virginia--Rio--which also came with a digital copy that I transferred to the iPad for the trip home.

Nora sat happily in the backseat with her snacks and her movie and didn't make a sound (except for the occasional laugh at the screen) for an hour and a half. We really don't let her watch much TV in our everyday lives, so I actually had no idea that her attention span was that good. Who knew? Oh, and we bought a really cool (and totally worth it) iPad accessory, too: a headrest mount. This thing was awesome. The iPad was out of Nora's reach, so she couldn't touch it, accidentally turning off the movie. And it was propped up in front of her so she could easily see and hear it. I highly recommend.

At about 8:00, we were already three hours into our trip and decided to stop off at a gas station somewhere in Pennsylvania. Nora's movie was over, and she was already about an hour past her normal bedtime. We went to the bathroom, topped off our gas tank (we still had about 1/2 tank, but filled up while we had the chance), changed Nora's diaper, and got her into her pajamas. As we got back on the road, we gave her a sippy cup of milk, a blanket, and her lovey, and she "chatted" happily in the dark backseat for a bit before she drifted off around 8:30.

She slept the rest of the way, folks. It was phenomenal.

And, for the record, we never stopped again. We were too afraid of waking the sleeping baby! Michael drove the last 5 to 5.5 hours straight through without stopping. I'm not a good car sleeper, so I was awake, too--except for a 15-minute stretch when I happened to doze off before waking up with a huge crick in my neck.

We pulled into my dad's driveway at 1:30 a.m. and went to bed. Nora woke up as we transferred her out of the car, but she did pretty well going back down to sleep. Tessa, on the other hand, was wired, which was a pain in the ass and didn't make for a great night's sleep. Nora woke up around 7:00 (maybe even earlier?), so we definitely weren't well rested.

Still, we would totally do it again. Having Nora sleeping peacefully in the backseat through the majority of the ride was fantastic.

Yesterday, when we drove home, we tried a different method: We left in the morning. We didn't get on the road until almost 8:30 a.m., and long story short--it was fine, but almost seemed even more tiring than driving at night.

The total trip home took an hour longer than the trip down--we stopped for almost an hour about halfway through the ride to have lunch and give Nora some time out of her carseat. Then, we hit rush-hour traffic when we got close to home (oops), so that set us back a bit, too.

Nora only slept for an hour and 15 minutes of the entire 9.5 hour trip. Yikes. We let her watch Rio in the beginning of the trip, then once it was over, we let her sit in the quiet back there and that's when she dozed off. Once she woke up, she babbled happily for a while, played peek-a-boo with Michael, and then we stopped for lunch. We let her watch Toy Story 3, then three episodes of Chuggington. :)

All in all, we probably stopped five times on the trip back up--diaper changes, gas, etc.--and that ate into our time as well. Nora had a few periods of crankiness, but again, was pretty good.

In the end, I slightly preferred the trip down over the trip back up. But leaving at night on our way down and leaving in the morning on our way home maximized our time with my dad and my family, so we would do it exactly the same way next time. And there will be a next time!

Thanks to all who offered tips and tricks for roadtripping with a baby. We were pretty lucky, but I can honestly say that MOVIES were, by far, the most helpful tool. Without the iPad and movies, I'm not sure what we would've done. Thank goodness for modern technology!

I'll share some pics from our trip over the next few days, so... more to come soon!

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